Written by Shayna Moorer, guest STRUT Contributor
This is a subject that is near and dear to my heart. Why?! Because before there was a Lizzo, there’s always been SHAYMO – your every day around the way Fat Girl SuperShero. My story starts out as typical as any other fat girl you know, like…
- I grew up chubby
- Guys were always ashamed to date the “cute big girl” in my wonder years
Blah, blah, blah. The GAG is I was taught early to love myself. Self-esteem was planted and cultivated in me very early on by my parents, and they reminded me I was beautiful and worthy at any size in a world where society tells larger women the complete opposite.
Early Days of How Society Viewed Fat Girls
As far back as I can remember (the early ’90s), the “big girl” was never a Cover Girl, a love interest in a movie or video, or featured in magazines, like Sports Illustrated or Playboy. Due to society’s standards, we were not considered beautiful or desired as “sexy.” These skewed POV’s have carried over well into our current days. In the most recent years, the “Big Girl” fetish or wave has been more popularized. We are coming from behind the Gloria Vanderbilt plus-sized section in J. C Penny and loving our bodies out loud. We are creating fashion-forward clothing for us to look and feel cute, sexy, and/or pretty for whatever the occasion calls for.
We are wearing what we want with our fupas, big bellies, stretch marks, dimpled thighs, and all out. We are dating who we WANT, not who we can get while being overly sexual when it comes to getting our needs met! People HATE IT, but that’s what is AMAZING to me still. In 2021, people hate that larger women have high standards and self-esteem. But when the past’s Luke Dancers’ and today’s video vixens exercise their “sexy” boob jobs, butt injections, and belly tops/booty shorts, it’s embraced. Yet, when you see a woman over 300 pounds in a crop top, it’s a problem. (Oh Okay!)
In 2011, a study was done on The Huffington Post that discussed how thinner and cuter women are even paid better than larger women. The thing I find odd is how much denial people are in when things like this are called out and given labels, such as “fat shamers” or ” discrimination.” The defense is better than your favorite NFL football team.
Have you ever told a person, “You’re SO brave for wearing THAT” instead of “YASSSSSSSSS, you look great” or “you’re wearing that bodycon!” Have you ever approached a conversation when your fat friend says on her bad day, ”I’m so bloated – my belly is looking so big,” and you say “Oh, no. You’re beautiful.” Ummm, I said I was bloated, not ugly beloved. These are prime examples of how society has conditioned us to equate beauty and weight, but trust they are never equal.
As I bring my soapbox to a close, I want to give a PSA to people letting it be known large women are NOT lacking. We’re embracing ourselves where we are. Yes, we want to be healthy (but that’s a COMPLETELY different post – stay tuned).
Love Yourself
We are loving our curves and rolls, even when some of you are not. We are no longer taking backward compliments, such as ”You’re so pretty to be a Big Girl.” You can call us pretty or say nothing at all. That’s ALWAYS a great choice. I’m charging all of my big beautiful ladies to unapologetically STRUT in your “Fat Girl” shoes.
Alexa, cue Saucy Satana’s “Walk” until next time, people. That’s the way ShayMo Sees It!
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