BEHIND THE DIAGNOSIS

Am I Depressed?

With some much going on in the world, how do you stay sane while dealing with your own issues? Because I’m living have fibromyalgia one of the main questions the doctors often ask is “Are you depressed”? I never understood why until my relationship progressed.

I am no longer in control of my own body, Fabio is. I have limitations to what I can do, my life is no longer as I knew it. I have to adjust to my current normal. The pain I experience is indescribable and makes me want to shut down. I had to give up working because it’s too much to handle, physically. I’ve lost friends and significant others, all because Fabio was too much for them. Then you have, what I like to call “STINGERS” who are individuals that are mean, say mean things and make you feel bad for not feeling good or being able to move like you once did. 

In the midst of all of it, life is still happening. So, tell me how I’m supposed to keep smiling and keep pushing when so much is going on and people love to dismiss you or tell you that you complain too much or just get over it.

But, now that question makes sense to me.

I’ve never been depressed but I’ve come close to it. I get frustrated and feel defeated because i struggled with accepting my new normal. I get tired of taking medicine, so I stop taking it for periods at a time – stubborn I know.

Honestly, I see why people become addicts, you just want something to drown the pain away. Fabio messes with my mental,  like no other. I have to be strong-minded to handle all of this without letting it break me ( let me tell you it’s not easy.)

Ways I fight Depression:

1. Pray for strength (mental). 

When my body is at its worse, my praying game has to be at an all-time high. That’s how I defeat Fabio. My flesh may be weak and under attack but my spirits always remain high because I talk to God, I plead with God to always protect my spirit and soul.

2. Support Groups + Friends! 

I’ve  found several support groups which helps because I get to vent with no judgement, I blog as another outlet and I surround myself with positivity. I have amazing friends that I can be fully myself with (bad days and all), especially my bestie, we always pray together and send crazy funny memes.

3. Unplug from everyone and everything. 

To answer the question, I’m not depressed. But, just a few words of advice.. you don’t know who is. Don’t be so fast to dismiss someone, be kind, speak to strangers, and smile you never know what a person is battling and your kind gesture could just save a life.